Slow Down. Be Patient. Enjoy Life.

Published on by melissaperea5 Comments

Recently I have been plagued with this overwhelming feeling that everything in life is too rushed. I often feel that the world around me (myself included) can be so consumed with tomorrow and what it will bring that we rarely ever stop and enjoy today. The funny thing is that tomorrow never comes. If you are always chasing the future, you will never enjoy your present and once the past is in the past your memories cannot be remade.

I understand that in life we have goals, aspirations, and things you must plan for in order to obtain, but do you allow all of those things to consume you? I imagine that it was the expeditiousness of my daughters first year of life that has me brooding like a 17th century philosopher. Instead of allowing myself to rush forward and accomplish the next thing on my Life To-Do List, I find myself… contemplating my next move with extreme patience, wisdom, dare I say a mild amount of hesitancy and a huge dose of awareness.

So far the life I had planned on having when I was growing up has pretty much been given to me on a silver platter. I realize now that this is something I have taken for granted. When I was in High School my dream was to go to San Diego for college & find a husband. I applied to SDSU, I was accepted and I attended. Met Hector that first weekend. Graduated after 4 years. Married Hector two weeks after graduation. Got my first “real job” two weeks after we were married. Planned to have kids after 4-5 years and our daughter was born almost exactly 4 and 1/2 years later. We own a condo, drive a nice car, rent a house in our “dream” location, live near some of our best friends, vacation as often as possible and for all intents and purposes are extremely smitten with our life. I truly want for nothing.

Yet I have realized that its all too easy to become complacent with the life you have. Even when its mind-blowingly amazing. I find myself all too often trying to keep up with The Joneses and its a completely pointless aspiration because lets be honest there will always be someone out there who has a life that seems to be bigger, better and more wonderful then yours. And your life can be snatched from you in a matter of seconds. Mere seconds and without your approval.

So I find myself refusing to acquiesce to this “ideal” of life. Continue reading “Slow Down. Be Patient. Enjoy Life.” →

E’s 1st Birthday!!

Published on by melissaperea4 Comments

We have officially passed our first huge milestone as parents and celebrated our lovely daughter’s 1st birthday!! In true Mexican fashion we threw E a ginormous fiesta complete with an almost life size Minnie Mouse pinata straight from Mexico. The day was overwhelming, exciting, frustrating, stressful and joyous. To say that we did it for her would be a lie. It was 100% a selfish endeavor brought on by several factors, the least of which is me wanting to put my college degree in Event Planning to good use. But nonetheless it was a fantastic celebration regardless of the fact that the guest of honor was not even the slightest bit aware that the entire extravaganza was for her .

Anyhow it truly couldn’t have been a more perfect celebration and since so much of the day was inspired by pinterest I have decided to use the rest of this post to show you the details 🙂

As most of us know any party worth attending begins with a freaking awesome invitation. I stumbled upon something many many months ago from a little shop on Etsy. I pinned it and sent an email to the designer stating that I definitely wanted to buy her design, but that I was gonna wait until it got closer to her actual birthday (purchasing an invitation 6 months prior to her turning 1 was a little over zealous even for me). Much to my chagrin I went to purchase said “invitation” and the little shop on Etsy was CLOSED!!! I went berserk. Nothing else I found could even compare to how perfect this little invitation was. So I did the 2nd best thing and recreated the original design by myself in Microsoft Publisher. (If the original designer ever stumbles upon this post please take note that I owe you $15 & I am truly sorry I copied your original design, but you left me no choice). So anyhow here is a side by side look at the original invitation and my re-make of it. Continue reading “E’s 1st Birthday!!” →

He is Jealous for Me

Published on by melissaperea3 Comments

Music is an interesting thing.
It has the power to evoke an innumerable range of emotions.

I am not a huge follower of music by any means. I know what I like and what I don’t like, but I don’t know artist names or band names or song titles.

However certain songs just do it for me. This is one of them. I could be having the worst. day. ever. and this song will still bring me to my knees and make me feel an overwhelming sense of joy and love. It spreads through me binding itself to my bones and tears through my flesh like the most excruciatingly pleasant feeling known to man. It’s a feeling of love and passion that is stronger and more powerful than an ounce of the headiest perfume.

The song and its lyrics are 15 shades of pure awesome. David Crowder you truly are saturated with life-changing talent. In fact your lyrics just might be worthy of a tattoo.

So my friends, if you find yourself sitting inside the confines of a dark closet, dwelling on the shortcomings of your life and wishing there was something more to live for – I can tell you with the utmost certainty that peace in your life will not come with more money, a better job, fancy cars, a nice house, or a European vacation. It comes from one thing and one thing only. Knowing that your Creator loves you.

I have a theory that most people in life are trying to find Happiness when what they really want is Joy. A lot of people think that those words can be used interchangeably, but I beg to differ. Happiness is something you find in a new pair of shoes or finding your husband washing the dishes before he goes to work because he knew you had a rough night and wanted your day to have one less item on your to-do list (that last one comes from personal experience-thank you husband!) Joy on the other hand is a state of mind and its counterpart is peace. You can have one without the other, but things seem more balanced when they are both present.

In my life I want joy. It’s great to have happiness along the way, but I wanted to be blanketed with joy and immersed in peace. And this my friends comes from the One that the world wants to dismiss.

He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us oh
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

We are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking
So Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way

And oh, how He loves us oh
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

Snow in San Diego

Published on by melissaperea5 Comments

*2 years ago I started working from home because my employer decided to move to the east coast.
*5 months later I was forced to quit what I thought was the-most-amazing-job-ever.
*3 months after that I was still unemployed and looking for work.
*The next day I found out I was pregnant.
*I spent the following 6 months still looking for a job.
*Then I looked in the mirror and saw why I was more then likely not going to get hired by anyone.
*Non-discrimination laws don’t work.
*3 months later I became a mommy.
*We spent the next 6 months looking for a bigger house to rent.
*Our 600sq foot closet home continued to be our humble abode against our fiercest wishes for a bigger one.
*I cried on a long drive home a few months ago, from Laguna Nigel, because we didn’t get that 7th house we just applied for.  
*A week later at 5am I found out that after being denied our 7th applied house that-happened-to-have-everything-we-could-ever-ask-for-in-a-rental-except-a-dishwasher was now being offered to us.
*2 months ago I got a job writing from home. It was a dream.
*3 weeks after being hired I was laid off. Along with dozens of other writers.
*The next day Eliana started waking up 2-3x a night. It was hell. I think she was teething.
*This continued for 2 weeks.
*Did I mention we had house guests every single day of those 2 weeks.
*Then 5 days ago her first tooth finally broke through.
*For the last 4 nights she has been sleeping 12-13 hours every night.
*During those 2 weeks of hell-I-think-she-might-be-teething-but-its-just-a-theory she wanted to be held all the time.
*Yesterday I held her almost the entire day. Not because she wanted it, but because I needed it.
*And today I find myself sitting in a living room the size of our condo, watching Sesame Street with the most gorgeous child on the planet, listening to the dishwasher (that we didn’t think we were gonna get with this house, but ended up getting because our landlord decided to remodel the entire kitchen before we moved-in) wash the dishes so I can spend more time with Eliana and less time actually washing dishes, while drinking coffee as I contemplate the job that I never knew I could have, but always wanted and then lost, and I see how good life is. In fact its not just good, its superb. It’s beyond superb its exquisite. I have an exquisite life.

Sometimes amazingly good things happen and amazingly bad things happen. In the end its your perspective on how they balance out your opinion on life. So I am thinking today it just might Snow in San Diego. I have seen crazier things happen in my own life. The question is will you view the snow as something bad or something good…

Thank You for Pushing

Published on by melissaperea5 Comments

Many many years ago I found myself one Sunday morning sitting in the nursery at the Rock Church with a bunch of precious little newborns. I was serving that morning and I happened to meet a new mom who wanted to stick around for the first 20 minutes to see how her son would do. It was his first time in the nursery and her son was probably 3 or 4 weeks old I can’t exactly remember, but what I do remember is seeing the most beautiful, intricately designed and breathtaking ring ever. It was situated on the ring finger of her right hand so I had assumed it was an anniversary gift of some sort. I proceeded to ask her about it and she nonchalantly explained to me it was her Push Present. Insert awkward pause. I just sat there staring at her thinking I didn’t hear her correctly and when I realized she was gonna say nothing more on the subject I continued the conversation with a quizzical look and a slight tilt of my head. I think she was vaguely aware of my ignorance on the subject and when the silence got weird she finally clarified her previous statement with, “The ring is my push present. My husband gave it to me for pushing out this little guy”. Light bulb on! I returned the news with a bright smile and finally an understanding expression. I finally got it. I asked her if I could see it and she politely handed it over for me to get a closer look. It was truly love at first sight.

I think if Hector knew this conversation would have unfolded that morning he would’ve somehow tried to persuade me from going to church. But lucky me he isn’t clairvoyant and my Sunday morning proceeded as any other regular Sunday morning except on this day I learned about Push Presents. At the time I wasn’t even remotely close to desiring a child and yet this little tid bit of educational news on the wonders of becoming a new parent enticed me. Instead of doing something stupid like getting knocked up just so I could get a pretty ring I decided to file the memory away for future use 🙂 And let me just say that for the next 5 years I made sure Hector was randomly educated on the concept of a Push Present because you just never know when that knowledge of such a thing would come in handy. And boy did it come in handy.

Now my dear New Momma from above defined a Push Present as a gift she received from pushing her son out, but for those of you who would prefer a more specific definition here is what the wonderful Wikipedia has to say about the subject:

A push present (also known as a “push gift” or “baby bauble”) is a present a new father gives a new mother when she gives birth to their child. In practice the present may be given before or after the birth, or even in the delivery room.

Now, I personally find nothing insulting or wrong about wanting to bestow a beautiful gift to a new mother after enduring 9 months of pregnancy, who knows how many hours of labor and the obvious proceedings that one occurs from pushing a 26 cm head out of a 10 cm hole (and to all my friends out there who had to undergo c-sections you get an even better present for having to be cut open, just because you didn’t push didn’t mean it wasn’t hard!) But apparently, there is actually a lot of scrutiny over the idea of “Push Presents”. Some women think they are ridiculous and that its just another means of turning something beautiful such as the miracle of childbirth into something consumer driven and focused on material things. Now I can totally see where this perspective comes from, but I think you could also argue the same thing with almost any holiday or special occasion in life that involves presents. So that’s my 2 cents on that.

To be honest I had never thought about getting a gift for pushing out a child, that is until I saw that ring on that New Momma’s hand. I am pretty sure the dozens of generations before me never heard of such a concept, but lets be honest a lot has changed since the 1900’s and if Push Presents is one of them I am not complaining. But don’t get me wrong here. I am not some materialistic snob that thinks she is entitled to have anything and everything. However, if my husband feels the need to spoil me I will gladly accept.

Needless to say 6 1/2 months ago when I was at UCSD undergoing the most intense experience of my life the term Push Present was brought up by my husband. Eliana was 15 seconds old and laying on my chest and I was lying in a bed that looked more befitting to a crime scene then what I envisioned when I saw myself welcoming my child into the world. My husband was staring at me like he actually witnessed a murder instead of a birth as well so that was lovely. But after his initial shock his expression turned to wonderment and awe. He tilted his nose to my cheek and kissed me. Then in the softest voice ever in his attempt to not disturb the new life that lay on my chest even though she was a wailing, bloody, wet mess he whispered “You can have whatever you want for a push present, I’ll give you anything.”

I just turned and giggled. I was seriously experiencing the greatest natural high of my life and was letting it rush over me like a wave of joy. Oh the pure relief of having her out was honestly the only gift I wanted at that moment and I had found it. Truly there was nothing more that I wanted, but as we all know time passes, the days fade and life goes on. It’s not to say that after the high wore off that I felt I needed something more then her because let me tell you her smile is enough to keep me happy for all eternity. But for me though a push present was more of a need to commemorate that day and her birth into something special.

Since my first acknowledgment of a push present was in the form of a ring I think that idea just stuck with me. I don’t wear bracelets or necklaces really and even though I love earrings you really won’t see a day go by where I don’t have my pearl studs on. So naturally it made sense to want a ring if I ever planned on wearing the darn thing. Hector had casually asked me here and there what I was sort of thinking of when I thought of my push present and I simply told him this… I would love an heirloom piece of jewelry that I could pass on down to Eliana. Something that represents her and is timeless and classic. Not something that is disposable or will get tossed to the side as the years pass by. Something that I could wear and think of her and the day she was born.

I did a little research on her birthstone and was happy to realize that she was born in a month that represented a stone that I loved. Citrine comes in such beautiful colors, all differing shades of the sun. It was fitting on so many levels that I knew I wanted her stone to be a part of it. The rest was really up to him. I gave him a few recommendations on things I liked and disliked because he really wanted me to love it. In the end I realized I couldn’t have picked out something more beautiful and perfect if I had done it myself.

We went out to dinner a couple weeks ago and that’s when he bestowed upon me something that I love and treasure just as much as my wedding ring. Something that I will keep for the rest of my life and hopefully one day pass down to Eliana. A ring that represents all of the beauty that a new life brings. I couldn’t be more grateful and feel more loved by how much Hector appreciates me in my new role as wife and mother. Life is good.

So what do you think?

 

Book Review: Stieg Larsson’s Trilogy

Published on by melissaperea3 Comments

So this year I decided to age myself by 80 years and join a book club. And not just any Book Club, but “The Finer Things” Dinner and Book Club. To those of you who are fans of the Office you can get an idea of what we do the last Friday of each month. You may think it sounds nerdy, but I love it! I along with 6-9 of my friends depending upon who shows up vote on 1 book each month and then meet on the last Friday of that month for dinner and discussion.

Our first meeting in January was to decide on what our first book would be. We chose the first book from the bestselling trilogy by Stieg Larsson, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. I will be the first to admit that pages 1-100 were anything, but fascinating. A lot of it was background on the Swedish financial industry and was a little rough to get through. However, the rest of the book really blew my mind. It went from 5mph to 60 mph in a matter of pages.

I spent 3 weeks getting through it all (having a baby has slowly inhibited my ability to read 600+ pages within a day or two). However I must say that Book 2 – The Girl Who Played With Fire – was so amazing that I finished within 5 days :). I will admit Eliana might have spent a little more time in the swing or sitting in her bumbo, but Kids babies need time to learn how to self entertain… Right?

Anyhow the point of this post isn’t to point out my failures as a parent because I am obsessed with books. And the more I think about it if it keeps me sane and she is still happy then whose to say what is and isn’t acceptable as a parent. So moving on… Book 2 was Wonderful. Exquisite. Exciting. Dramatic. Powerful. Engaging. and it kept me wanting more and more. So I picked up Book 3 and read it in 2 days. So basically my opinion of the entire Stieg trilogy is to just READ IT. Unless you are someone that likes books that are filled with nothing but heart shaped emotions and fairies sprinkling happy dust on everyone because these books have an intensely dark side and are definitely rated R.

But with that I have to tell you that everything serves a purpose. Stieg doesn’t include random and ridiculous sexual encounters and neither does he make the book so utterly unrealistic that its a chore to try and imagine such events ever truly existing. I think he balances everything quite well and if you can’t accept that dark and disturbing things happen in real life then you won’t be able to accept them in his book. Move on. Find another prince charming romance. You know something about a boy who meets a girl and they live happily ever after. Blah. Blah. Blah. Yuck.

The only unfortunate thing about Stieg Larsson’s  novels is that he wasn’t alive to see them printed.

Next Review: The Help by Kathryn Stockett along with The City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare and The Wise Man’s Fear by Patrick Rothfuss. The Rothfuss book still needs to be cracked open. I am saving it for when I know I have a good chunk of time to dedicate to it. It’s no Mother Goose Fairytale. In the mean time I am reading Pride and Prejudice for the umpteenth time just because I love it that
much 🙂

Doing the Jig

Published on by melissaperea3 Comments

Do you ever stumble upon something you just find so hilarious that you can’t stop laughing and you end up minorly peeing your pants? Well that’s how I feel about this photo of Eliana. Not only is this NOT posed, but it just happens to be St. Patrick’s Day and she looks like she is dancing the Irish Jig and seems to be about as happy as the Leprechaun on a box of Lucky Charms.

So should I high hopes that Eliana might do the River Dance one day? 🙂

Cymbalta – Depression Hurts

Published on by melissaperea8 Comments

If there was one word that would be considered an antonym of my life I think depressed would work quite well. There is hardly a day where I do not have a smile on my face and even on my worst days I feel like I can still make the sun shine out of my ass (props to Diablo Cody and Juno’s Father – one of my favorite lines in that movie and my apologies to those who think ass is a rather terse word – I am quoting someone else so be mad at them).

Anyway to get back to the point at hand depression. Apparently depression hurts and Cymbalta can help. I used to think commercials for medicine that healed depression were for the weaklings of the world who just couldn’t get their lives together and be happy. Now after having a baby and experiencing early onset Postpartum Depression aka The Baby Blues I humbly apologize to those who are affected by depression every day. It’s no laughing matter.

I know most of us have all heard the term “Postpartum Depression” and generally its not something most people, I think, would like to admit having. I don’t know why the world we live in likes to sugar coat everything in life and make it seem that everything is peaches and cream. Because guess what… it isn’t. If I truly tried to describe to you all how I felt during the first 3-4 weeks of Eliana’s life I am afraid I might scare some of you away from ever having kids. But I think I am going to take my chances and risk telling the truth instead of candy coating it. This way if you find yourself in similar shoes you won’t think your a crazy bad person who doesn’t love their child and is on the brink of a mental breakdown. So be forewarned my words might act as birth control.

So let’s begin with the definition of Postpartum Depression (PPD). PPD is a temporary depression related to pregnancy and childbirth. It comes in two forms: early onset, commonly referred to as the “baby blues,” and late onset. The early-onset type is mild and may affect as many as 80% of women after they deliver. It starts after delivery and usually resolves within a couple of weeks without medical treatment. The later-onset form is what most people think of as “postpartum depression”. This more severe form is usually recognized several weeks after delivery. Overall it affects about 10%-16% of women.

I place myself in the “baby blues” department of PPD, however I believe I teeter-tottered towards late-onset PPD, but thankfully was able to pull it together after 4 weeks. For those of you have truly experienced a prolonged form of late-onset PPD… I do not envy you. The medical world describes symptoms of the “baby blues” as including sadness, anxiety, tearfulness, and trouble sleeping. These symptoms usually appear within several days of delivery and go away within 10-12 days post delivery. Usually the only treatment needed is reassurance and some help with household chores and the care of the baby.

I say usually because this is where I place myself between the baby blues and late-onset PPD. I don’t even know if I can fully describe how I felt since feelings can be so subjective, but basically life sucked and I wasn’t prepared.

Since Eliana was in the NICU for her first week that part wasn’t that bad. However weeks 2, 3 and 4 felt like I was in the twilight zone. Everyone tells you to sleep all you can before you deliver because you will never sleep again. There is some major truth to that statement. But it’s so much more than that. Not only was I physically exhausted from the lack of sleep and from breastfeeding, but I felt like I was mentally losing it. I remember taking a walk with Hector while my sister was watching Eliana and I just started to cry. I had so many emotions streaming through me and I was afraid that if I was honest with him he would be scared and think that I really was losing it (even though I sort of was). 

For starter’s I felt very little love towards Eliana. I knew I loved her, but loving her was a whole different ball game. All she did was feed, sleep, cry, poop and repeat. It sounds simple enough, but I really started to believe that I was not cut out for motherhood. I started to rethink my plans of having a big family and I started feeling the worst anxiety and fear that it was going to be like this forever…… and ever…… and ever. My life as I knew it had ended. 
I tried really hard to play it cool those first few weeks. Whenever we had company over I put a smile on my face and some blush on my cheeks. I tried my hardest to look like the happy new mother who was utterly enraptured in her child, but inside I felt this big dark expanse of emptiness. Thankfully the days were easier then the nights, but the nights… oh the nights. They were hell on a shiny silver platter.
I started to wonder how in the world people had more then 1 child…
And then it was Sunday, the last day I would have Hector with me before he went back to work. The internal tears of fear were flowing and I felt a flood was about to ensue. I told him I had no idea how I was going to survive without him. Luckily, I have an amazing husband who had zero doubt in my ability to take care of our child, but I on the other hand had all the doubt in the world. That first Monday came and went and somehow I did survive.

My exact situation might have been worsened considering the extent to which delivering Eliana had destroyed me downstairs. I read a lot about other women who had undergone severe tearing and that it was common to have depression. I mean when peeing and pooping (life’s simplest tasks) become as time consuming and exhausting as running a marathon its no wonder one would start to have an Eeyore complex.

However, with the bad definitely came the good. At 4 weeks Eliana finally gave me my first real smile. Not a gas induced crinkling of her lips that you thought was a smile. And it was like all my fears, insecurities, worries, frustrations and exhaustion just melted away. It was at that moment that I finally fell IN love with my daughter. She also started sleeping through the night right around that time and it was MAGNIFICENT.

Sometimes I wonder why in the world God would make those first weeks/months so difficult for parents. I mean I understand the whole pain in childbirth situation, but couldn’t we get a small reprieve after accomplishing something as wonderful as BIRTHING a child?! But now I see that its all a part of the big picture. If it wasn’t hard, if we didn’t lose sleep, if it was as easy as pie – then our love for our children wouldn’t be as fierce as God had intended. We would take them for granted and we wouldn’t go to the ends of the earth to protect them and provide for them. Because I can tell you wholeheartedly without a single doubt in my mind I would give up ANYTHING and EVERYTHING for that little 15lb chunker sleeping just mere steps away from me.

My Lexus? Here are the keys. Our condo? let me just shine those floors for you first. Our beautiful San Diego location? cars packed and I am ready to move… To Minnesota in the Winter? sounds superb! Trips to the mall? Vacations? Fancy Restaurants? Whatever you want… its yours as long as I get to keep her.

So when I look back at weeks 2, 3 and 4 of her life I can still see the dark cloud that hovered above me, but I can also see the sun trying to break through. I wish I had been more prepared for what to expect during those first few weeks, but in the end I am glad to know that life has only gotten sweeter.

People complain and say that kids change things and that life will never be the same. But isn’t that the whole point? Ask most people over 80 years of age if they could be 21 forever and they would say No. Every season in life has its time and its place. I would hate to look back at my life and regret not having kids just so that I could sleep more or travel more or have a higher disposable income. Life is about relationships and the things you do with people through those relationships. I would hate to be on my death bed and have my final thoughts be… “Well at least I drove a bad ass Ferrari”.

Although if I could have all of thee above and a Ferrari I wouldn’t complain.

Just sayin 🙂

Romance isn’t Rocket Science

Published on by melissaperea4 Comments

To all the men out there…

Here’s a little lesson in Romance.

When I married Hector I thought we knew each other pretty well. Now fast forward almost 5 years into our marriage and I stand corrected. Sometimes I think he knows more about me then I know about myself. It’s scary.

So on with the lesson.

Neither one of us are really huge on Valentine’s Day, but we generally do something little to commemorate the holiday. I think its just a fun day to show everyone you care about that you love them. So this year, now that we have a kid and all we decided to share one thing that we love about each other every day for the 14 days leading up to Valentines Day. It was pretty fun and we started learning more about how we value one another. The best part was that Eliana was having a pretty rough time sleeping well at night during those 14 days and it was starting to wear on me so since we shared our reason right before bed, it gave me something to look forward to other then a sleepless night. However on day 10 my husband surprised me.

The night before happened to be an exceptionally rough night with Eliana. She was waking up every hour or 2 and before Hector left for work he stopped to give me a kiss and see how I was doing. Apparently I looked horrible and he asked me if I was going to be okay. I just nodded and rolled over. Since E was still asleep I wasn’t going to miss out on precious minutes of uninterrupted zzzzz’s. I can discuss my lack of sleep with him later. So he leaves for work and I am still in bed. About 20 minutes go by and Eliana decides to wake up. A happy awake, but nonetheless awake. So I got my grumpy irritated self out of bed and tended to my child’s needs. It wasn’t like she was going to feed herself (although I keep hoping for a miracle).

I drag my feet over to her bed and of course she is smiling and so I smile back (3 months old and she is already manipulating my moods). I spend about 4 seconds smiling and cooing at her until I see this bright orange wrapper laying on top of her. I grab it to see what it is …

Yuuuuuummeeeeeee. It was 9:30am so what did I do with my new found surprise? I opened it and ate it of course. If this was Hector’s way of putting me in a better mood… it worked. At this point I didn’t know if the Reese’s was his way of saying I love you or his way of making me still love Eliana even though she was being a giant booger when it came to sleeping. So after I chowed that puppy down I headed to the fridge because I was desperately in need of some milk.

I open the fridge and to my surprise again I find…

Now, my first guess was that he bought 2 Reese’s hearts. One for me and one for himself. The one for him he placed in the fridge. A completely logical explanation for heart #2, but then I thought what if there is more?? So after I ate heart #1 I drank some milk and then thought long and hard about it and decided to wait on eating heart #2 in case it was in fact for him. So I proceeded with my normal routine and low and behold…

Heart # 3!! Now I was super excited 🙂 I knew if he had taken the time to hide 3 then there had to be more. So what did I do? I went back to the fridge and ate heart # 2 of course. Only because now I knew for sure it wasn’t waiting for him to get home. And to follow with heart # 3, came 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and eventually 9.

#4 Under Harley’s leash because he knew eventually I would walk her. 

#5 In Harley’s food because well eventually I would feed her too. 

#6 Eliana’s Diaper Caddy – which apparently needed to be filled with more diapers. 

#7 – The computer because in all honesty I am on this thing 5+ hours each day.

#8 Eliana’s Boucer because when I get tired of holding her she goes here 🙂


#9 was eventually hand delivered at the end of the day when he came home from work. Why 9 you ask? because we have spent the last 9 Valentine’s Day loving each other. Seriously I was melting. On top of that he bought me flowers the next day. And not your V-day $19.99 2 dozen red rose special – he bought me tulips 🙂 He looked for peonies first (which are my favorite), but apparently they cost $20 a stem right now and are hard to find.

He chose 5 pink ones for the years we have been married and 
4 yellow for the years we were dating.
So to put it in the simplest of terms I was melting like butter in a microwave. The fact that he thought about what I do every morning when I wake up to get through my day was just precious. So this leads me back to my point… Romance isn’t Rocket Science. Husbands, boyfriends, significant others etc. it doesn’t matter if you have been together for 1 year or 50 years knowing how to romance your wife is worth its weight in gold.
Hector definitely knows me. I like thought put into gifts. I don’t like the most expensive thing on the market (however a girl does appreciate sparkly things). So even though I doubt he will read this I just have to tell you honey – Best Valentine’s Day Ever (although v-day #1 was pretty awesome too, props to Daniel Ambler). He also bought me a Kindle which is something I never knew I needed, but always wanted and now that I have it am trying to figure out how I ever lived life before without it. You know what I mean?
So anyhow sometimes a girl has to brag about how amazing her man is 🙂 not for my sake, but for his. I hope this somehow goes full circle and gets back to him. Because hearing how tickled I was from someone else is even better then hearing it directly from me. 
Part 2: My gift to Hector
So I will admit I am a horrible gift-giver when it comes to my husband. He likes nice, expensive things and has a very specific taste so whenever I set out to buy him something nice I almost always fail. A part of me has given up and most of the time I just take him shopping with me so he truly gets what he wants. However, if there is one area where I do succeed its in making him gifts. In the past I have made him picture collages, framed poetry, artwork etc. I hadn’t made him something in awhile because I thought he preferred nice, expensive things, but he made a comment one day about how I hadn’t made him anything in awhile. Soooo I set out to make my first iMovie about our last year together and I got the exact reaction I was hoping for…  sniff sniff ; )
Here is the direct link in case the embedded version is slow  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dr34HxLoNXw

Postpartum and 2 months

Published on by melissaperea2 Comments

So its been 2+ months since Eliana was born and I can officially say that I am already excited to be pregnant again some day. Not anytime soon, but within the next few years. The first few weeks were definitely an adjustment, but by week 4 I felt like I had a pretty good grasp on things. And now I am loving it 🙂

So I thought since I gave updates about how the pregnancy was going I would give an update about how the post-pregnancy was going 🙂

When I was admitted for Eliana’s delivery I weighed about 175lbs. I was teetering on the 50lb mark as far as weight gain goes. Eeeek. When you hear that your suppose to gain between 25 and 35 I was a little worried that I was gonna be permanently huge even after she came out. However, it was somewhat comforting to know that she was on the large end as far as babies go and apparently I had a placenta that was double the average size (about 4lbs). So I lost 15lbs in just the delivery alone when you consider fluid loss as well. So that put me at 160. Still pretty scary considering I am only 5’6”.

Within the first 2 weeks I lost another 15lbs. I am not sure if other women experienced this but I was a sweat machine. Especially at night when I slept. I seriously felt like I had to take 10 showers a day. It was gross. I would wake up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat. I definitely don’t miss that. However at the 2 week mark I sort of hit a plateau and stopped losing weight. So I was at 145 and I stayed there for about 3 more weeks. I was a little bummed that I still had 20lbs on me that didn’t seem to want to leave. Especially when some women only gain 20lbs during their entire pregnancy.

Needless to say I attempted at putting my old jeans on 5 weeks postpartum. Not a good idea. Those suckers wouldn’t even budge over my hips (which might I mention had widened to about the size of the Titanic). I honestly felt there was no way they would ever go back to normal. I had a good 5 inches between the button on my jeans and the button hole. It seemed an impossible request that the button would ever meet that hole again. Pretty depressing.

So I decided to toss those suckers at the bottom of my drawer and forget about them. My maternity jeans still fit me and I figured I would just sport those for the next year or decade if need be. So life carried on and I continued to breastfeed and decided to not concern myself with the scale or my old jeans. Life was good.

It wasn’t until maybe a few days ago when my sister and Hector both complained that I looked ridiculous in my maternity jeans that I decided to try on my old jeans. First I stepped on the scale out of curiosity and sure enough I had dropped 10 more pounds!! I was looking at 135lbs and I was ecstatic. I still had doubts that the jeans would fit considering my hips still looked freakishly wide. But to my surprise (albeit with a little manhandling and special maneuvering) my jeans fit!! I did have to do some lunges and squats to loosen them up a bit, but hey I got them buttoned without having to deal with a muffin top. Success at last.

At this point I don’t really care/want to lose any more weight any time soon. I know I need to keep on some weight to continue breastfeeding and that over the next few months it will probably go away as I start to exercise again and get back into a healthy routine. So word to the wise Breastfeeding is amazing!! And not everyone fits into the 25-35lb weight gain range. My body gained exactly what it needed to (apparently exactly what it needed to created a 9lb 3oz mammoth baby). As long as your not overeating and chowing down on sweets each day I would say trust your body, it knows what its doing.

Now onto the more delicate issue my “downstairs” situation. To be honest the first 3 weeks after delivering her weren’t that bad. However I think my nerve endings started to come back around week 4 and then let’s just say things got uncomfortable. I ended up going in for a minor procedure to fix my situation and then I finally started feeling better. Having to deal with a 4th degree tear is not fun. I might even go as far as to say that the postpartum healing was way worse then my 33 hours of labor. Either way I am glad both are over. Because I can officially say I feel “almost” normal again. I am not sure if things will ever be the same down there, but considering what a vaginal birth can do to you I think that’s to be expected.

So for now things are amazing and I have nothing to complain about 🙂 Except however for the lack of one small 3 letter word in my life. We still haven’t tried that yet. I was thinking a good solution would be Valentine’s Day, a giant bottle of wine and lots of glide from my good friend Astro. I mean if we ever want to have child #2 its eventually gonna have to happen. Right?

Wish me luck.